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Would Michigan ever be the same again?
Kid Rock/Twitter screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET
America is the nation that immortalizes its finest politicians in rock.
It seems, though, that America’s living Rocks are stepping forward to make our nation great again.
No sooner had were heard mutterings that the Rock might consider a political run than here is Kid Rock (no relation, I believe) uplifting his own political ambitions.
You surely aren’t going to take him seriously, are you?
On Wednesday, the conservatively minded musician took to Twitter to declare: “I have had a ton of emails and texts asking me if this website is real… http://kidrockforsenate.com The answer is an absolute YES.”
Some will be absolutely delirious. Others will mumble: “Well, at least it’s not Ted Nugent.”
The idea, it seems, is for Kid Rock to run for the Senate in Michigan.
You’re inclined to believe it? Surely not.
Indeed, the KidRockForSenate.com website to which he referred is already full of fine “campaign” apparel you can buy, such as hats, T-shirts and bumper stickers.
It also includes statements such as “Are You Scared?,” “In Rock We Trust” and “Pimp Of The Nation.”
He’ll surely fit right into the American political scene. He has pithy slogans and a ready-made dollop of admirers. Indeed, some took it very seriously.
Love your heart & your passion for America, can’t wait to hear your news!! 🇺🇸😘
— lisakitter (@lisakitter) July 12, 2017
Some media outlets did too.
Some on Twitter were, though, a little concerned. Comedian and writer Jenny Johnson, for one.
Kid Rock running for Senate is like Donald Trump running for Presi… nevermind.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) July 12, 2017
Comedy Central could only see comedy.
Diehard fan Josh Epstein begged the Kid to be kidding.
I’ve always respected you and you’ve always been cool to me. Please don’t run for office, man. You’re a rapper at heart, Bob
— JOSH EPSTEIN (@JRJRJosh) July 12, 2017
There was, naturally, delving into Kid Rock’s past.
Some saw only the rapture-free end of times.
Nonprofit investigator Robert Maguire resorted to the outdated concept known as the fact.
I exist, though, only to reassure. Though Kid himself insisted on Twitter: “Stay tuned, I will have a major announcement in the near future – Kid Rock,” I remain drily skeptical.
You see, I clicked on the link to buy his campaign merchandise. It went through to a Warner Bros. Records page. Rock’s representatives told me: “More soon.”
Must there be?